Edinburgh Festival Diary 31st July 2008

THE FIRST SHOW.

Oh lord. Come on though, let's be chronological. Oh fuck me! There's a moth the size of a bat in here. God, it has blue face make up on and is shouting about freedom and everything. Jeezus Kryst.
Anyway, that's happening now, so that's hardly chronological is it? I did warn you that most of these blogs would be written in a hazy wined state.

Right. Start of the day. Alarm went off. Snooze. Alarm went off again. Snooze. If I keep pressing snooze, I won't have to do the show, right? Right. No. Scott woke me with tea, the nice bastard. He was playing chipper cheesy music. I suppose I'd better get up. So I tea showered and toasted and got myself dressed. Then we went to pick up Paddy. Thank the lord (why's he in this blog so much, get out! That minister friend of mine is a bad influence...) ANYWAY Thank the lord (No!) the was awake and ready to leave. He'd even sorted out a bucket and sellotape for me to decorate for the collection at the end.

When we arrived at the venue they were clearing up from last night's shennanigans (our venue is a club, oh yes!) So I left the boys to attempt to change fuses in plugs and arrange chairs while I went out and did my flyering magic. And it worked. We got 7 people in.

What? 7 people? That's shit. Well, yeh, but it was fine. It was better than 2 shows, one 'established comedian' that we attempted to go to tonight which were cancelled because we were the only people to show up. So, for a show at midday on the first day, 7 is good. Alright. SHUT UP. (Breathe).

So we did the show.

It was probably the BEST THING YOU'LL EVER SEE IN EDINBURGH AND OH MY GOD YOU SHOULD ALL COME AND SEE IT. EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT IN EDINBURGH IT'S WORTH THE JOURNEY. EVEN IF YOU'RE IN AMERICA, IT'S WORTH THE JOURNEY. IT'S HOTTER SHIT THAN SLICED HOT SHIT.

Good. I'm glad we're agreed.

After the show, we went to the Royal Mile for a drink, a smoke and a post-match discussion. While Scott ran back to the venue to get a prop we'd forgotten to pick up, I spotted Tim Vine. It was like "Oh look, there's Tim Vine". Scott ran back and said "Look! There's Tim Vine!" and proceeded to utilise the zoom facility on his camera to snap him on the phone. While this was happening Mr Vine caught my eye and saw what scott was doing, and he did a silly wave. He then walked over and put his arm around me to pose for a photo, all without being asked or removing the phone from his ear. What a nice chap.

What else? Er. Oh yes, I ran into a chap called Joe who worked at Pappy's venue last year so I saw a lot. He was surprised to see that I wasn't depressed yet. So that was nice.

After that I welcomed Harry Deansway, King of the Fix to the flat, and Emily, one of this year's interns. Then, er... Had some dinner, watched some Anually Retentive, which I didn't enjoy that much, and then went to catch those two shows which were cancelled. Good!

I did see two shows which weren't cancelled though. I sauntered into Mark Olver's 'Ramble On', and accidentally accused him of excessive masturbation. Don't drink and comedy! Then we went to see an American chap Scott had made friends with earlier whose show is called Cowboys and Indians. His performance was fantastic and everyone there had a lot of fun. There was a slight case of audience over participation though. You know when someone joins in and they're a star too, but they get a bit carried away and join in too much and you just want them to shut the fuck up? Yeh.

Then I walked home and now I'm here. Since then, the moth happened. And I've spoken to a couple of friend on msn. Yeh, that's right. While doing so, my good friend Paul told me we're listed on chortle and they reckon we're comedy, so that's a good thing. So I had a look and here we are. But who the blimmin heck's face is that? That's none of us, oh no.

So, will tomorrow be better than today? IS THAT POSSIBLE? REMEMBER HOW FUCKING AMAZING I SAID IT WAS!?!(In all seriousness it went well, not perfect, but fine. Onwards and upwards)

Bye bye now, I have to get to bed. (Well maybe just one more glass of wine first...)

Sophie x

Edinburgh Festival Diary 30th July 2008 - ADDENDUM

I forgot to point out this thing I found in the fringe programme. Doug Stanhope's entry...

Day With Doug Unprecedented opportunity to spend a full day with Doug Stanhope. Who knows what magic this might mean? One ticket only available. No hangers-on/mates - just you and Doug for the day. Over 18s only.

25 Aug 2008

11:00

£7349.00

You can actually book THE ticket here.

What a hero.

Sophie x

Edinburgh Festival Diary 30th July 2008

If you're one of those annoying bastards who think that once it's past midnight it's the next day then the show is today. Argh. You know the twunts I mean, you're at a party and say,

"Anyway, I'd better go, up early tomorrow"
"Don't you mean today?! It's 2am!!!"
"Fuck off you pedantic imbecile."

I think it's generally accepted that the day begins when you wake, right? Jeez. The show is not today, it's tomorrow. So fuck off. Yes, today I have a headache, I had a couple of glasses of wine, but couldn't have more because I don't feel well. Scott thinks it's because I am nervous, and I am nervous, but do nerves give you a feeling of trapped wind? I hope it's not saving itself for the show tomorrow.

Anyway, breathe......

Ah, that's better. Right. Today... Run through, over ran again, decided to cut a favourite sketch of mine. I get to repeatedly sing the theme tune to Dawson's Creek in it. Who wouldn't love that? Anyway, it is not to be. Maybe one night we can swap it in, but for now it has to go.

"I don't wanna wait, for my life to be over, I want to know right now, what will it be?"

That's the Dawson's Creek theme tune, right? Good. Erm, what after that. We went in to town to again attempt to pick up our flyers. This time success. They look great. It was also very exciting to see our posters up outside the venue. While there I also picked up my press pass and some tickets Scott and I had prebooked. One of these included tickets for the recording of a radio show Armando Iannucci is recording up here. The girl at the box office said,

"And two for Armando... erm, Charm Offensive"
"It's Iannucci"
"Oh. It's funny what ridiculous names they give their shows isn't it?"
"Yeh, that's actually his name."
"Oh."

It's good to know they only hire the best at the Fringe box office. She also pronounced Fauré (fow-ree). What a dick. Isn't this blog in such a good mood. Does it show I'm anxious about tomorrow? I'm looking forward to it, but shitting my pants. Basically a mood I've been in for months now. Feeling much more confident about the show now though. Yes.

I also met up with a good friend of mine who I haven't seen for years. He used to be my vocal coach, teaching me to sing good and that. Then he moved back up to Scotland, so I haven't seen him for a while. Some of you may remember him from such blogs as 'Minister's Question Time'.

The evening involved a final rehearsal, a headache, a pseudo-nap (I can't nap as it takes me over an hour to get to sleep. I just rest) and then heading off to the Free Festival launch party.

Met a lovely girl called Katrina, who's show is called Hurricane Katrina. You should all go and see it. Because she was nice. Alright? Good.

I'd best go to bed now. Early start tomorrow. And some show thing. God, what if no one turns up?

The show must go on...

Sophie x

Edinburgh Festival Diary 29th July 2008

Yes. The Fopp staff in Edinburgh are total winners. For those of you who can't make out what's going on here (what are you, an idiot?), this is a staff recommendation for The Wicker Man and under "why we like it" Steven (the hero) has written...

"A great sing along soundtrack. Like Grease with more breasts. Best Scottish film ever?"

Steven is obviously a hero.

What else happened today? This -

Wake up. Rehearsals. Have lunch. Rehearsals. Wander into town. Go to Fopp. Snigger. Take Photo. Have Haggis, tatties* and neeps** for dinner at what was apparently the oldest pub in Edinburgh. Come home. Wine. Rehe(Wine.)arsals. Wine. Come online. Wine. Write Blog.

The show starts on Thursday 31st. Bye.

Sophie x

*Potatoes/Potartoes
**Turnips/Turnarps

Edinburgh Festival Diary 28th July 2008

*caution* This and most of the blogs following will be written under the influence of wine, tiredness and a deluded "I'm having fun honest" sort of denial outfit. But it suits me, and I wear it often.

Right, so I'm going to write a daily blog while I'm here at the Edinburgh Festival. As some of you will, and some of you won't know, I'm taking part in a show here. Myself and two others - Scott and Paddy - are performing a comedy sketch show called In The Mouth. This comes from the fact we are Bournemouth people, not the fact that we all like a big pile of spunk in our mouths, though this may be true* However, since I have been telling friends, and particularly comedians about the show I get a raised eyebrow and occasionally a question such as "is it racy?" It's not racey unless you're into the idea of me in a beard as Darwin in the style of Dudley Moore. What?

Oh, what's in a name?!

So, yes, DAY ONE! I started packing, and when I say packing I mean unpacking (from uni) then packing (for Edinburgh), God, where was I? I started packing at about 10pm. And there was much laundry to be done and sorting and zzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Sorry I bored myself there. Basically I got to sleep at 4am after some emergency magazine work. And the alarm went beeeeeeeeeeeeeep (it didn't, I'm totally lying at you, it played 6music) at 6.30am. Good!

God, sorry! blah-blah-blah, in conclusion I was tired when I got here. Nice flat, landlord is a Scottish Hugh Laurie. My boyfriend disagrees with this, but I'm sure it's because he doesn't want to encourage it, knowing I crushed on Hugh Laurie way before all you Americans* found him hot in House. George in Blackadder the Third as a teenage crush? FTW!

So Edinburgh is pretty dead at the moment. It's the first time Scott has been here so I showed him around the town, pointing out the main venues, drinking holes, castle, bagpipe players, and standing open mouthed at the fog....

It was sunny two hours ago! Now I can't see a thing. Yes, that's the castle, 20 metres away. What do you mean "Where?"?***...

So, not much to report as yet, apart from the fact we're all far too relaxed about the show. Hey ho. I wan't to achieve either (or both) of the following things.

1 - Have a good time.
2 - Put on a good show.

And that's the priority order.

Just a little room here for some shameless self-promotion right? (Don't forget to check the footnotes below****)



Bye guys, check back. At some point there will actually be stuff going on and I won't blabber on about nothing. Mmm.... wine.

Sophie x

*I'm assuming.
** Brayton? You would, right?
*** This seems like ridiculous punctuation but it seems to make logical sense.
****Because they're SO worth it.